Diane began to flirt with other men to get attention, but she never considered having an affair. After a business trip with a friend turned romantic, she began a long-term affair, a path she admits she was likely on anyway as her marriage dissolved.
Continued
“They are on a sinking ship and use it as a life raft because they don’t want to just jump into the cold water,” Reilly says.
She also sees some women have affairs during periods of vulnerability or life change, like when a child goes off to college or after a job loss. They may see it as a form of comfort during upheaval.
Another common reason is a cry for help in the marriage. One of Reilly’s patients had an affair, ended it, and then told their husband as a way to point out they were in more trouble than they thought.
Reilly says her clinical experience has shown that affairs are almost always caused by problems in the marriage. Therapy may be helpful to avoid going down that path.
“People have affairs because they are looking for something,” Reilly says. Although she sees a number of http://www.hookupdate.net/de/raya-review couples grappling with infidelity, “more people come to me [before it happens] because they want to save their marriage.”
Affairs with Intention
Women are also less likely than men to have an affair that “just happens,” because they tend to think longer and harder about the situation, experts say.
Women are also less likely than men to have an affair that “just happens” because they tend to think longer and harder about the situation, experts say.
Some women take time “to warm up to it,” Marcella Weiner, adjunct professor at Marymount Manhattan College, says. “Going in and leaving quickly isn’t their thing. Men can walk away more easily because their emotions are just different and it is unusual for a woman to want to have sex and forget about it.”
But she sees that women do connect with their partners in affairs and think more about taking part in one.
“Women really can recognize the risk for them,” Reilly says, pointing to the possibility of losing their partner because of an affair.
Sources
“You feel the loss of your dreams and hopes and how you thought things would turn out,” Diane says. “I was very lonely; I could never understand the concept of being lonely in a marriage until it happened.”
“Women tend to be more unhappy with the relationship they are in,” Fisher says, “while men can be a lot happier in their primary relationship and also cheat. Women are more interested in supplementing their marriage or jumping ship than men are — for men, it is a secondary strategy as opposed to an alternate.”
But she sees that women do connect with their partners in affairs and think more about taking part in one.
“You feel the loss of your dreams and hopes and how you thought things would turn out,” Diane says. “I was very lonely; I could never understand the concept of being lonely in a marriage until it happened.”
“Women tend to be more unhappy with the relationship they are in,” Fisher says, “while men can be a lot happier in their primary relationship and also cheat. Women are more interested in supplementing their marriage or jumping ship than men are — for men, it is a secondary strategy as opposed to an alternate.”
But she sees that women do connect with their partners in affairs and think more about taking part in one.
“You feel the loss of your dreams and hopes and how you thought things would turn out,” Diane says. “I was very lonely; I could never understand the concept of being lonely in a marriage until it happened.”
